redressing the balance
Okay, so yesterday I sounded like a spoilt child, I’m really sorry. In my (feeble) defence, I was tired and had spent the whole day playing referee between Duke and Aprilia who are very skilled at winding each other up at the moment. I’m not sure when the relationship between that pair slipped but Oh Boy it’s slipped! Duke used to read bedtime stories to Aprilia whilst I had some down time. It gave them time together and she did enjoy it as he would read the dread Rainbow Magic books to her which she still loves and which I still loath reading! If I’m going to make the effort to read to her I want it to be something I enjoy for goodness sake!!! I’m not sure why he stopped reading to her at bedtime but I think I may have to re-instigate this in the new year. I suspect part of it is that I’ve got lazy during the day, not doing "school" with her so needing to read "daytime stories" to her at bedtime. This also has to change as by 7:30 I’m getting too tired to be patient with a tired girl trying to delay bedtime with "Mummy, we didn’t do any puzzles today, can I do them now" and then melting down at things she’s perfectly capable of doing.
In fact, there has to be change in general over the next 12 months. I’m not naive enough to think I can sweep into the new year with a whole new routine but I do need to gradually introduce better habits and start to get a better grip on life. I can’t expect Aprilia to keep her side of the bargain when I’m not keeping mine, I can’t expect her to make an effort with her room when there’s junk on my floor, nor can I expect her to suddenly stop what she’s doing because I’ve finished aimlessly browsing the web and am ready to do school if I’m not willing to stop what I’m doing to do something for her. I have to stop behaving like an only child before she turns into the stereotypical only child.
This morning she wobbled because I’d asked her to pack an overnight bag as she is sleeping over at Emmie’s tonight. She knew what she needed to end up with (a bag full of stuff she would need) but had no idea how to get from where she was to where she needed to be. It brought home to me that really she does struggle without careful direction and simplified instructions, broken down into little chunks. I know it’s a typically Dyxie trait (we see The Big Picture not the Detail!) but that doesn’t help her really does it? So we need to introduce "Practical Life Activities" into the day so that instructions like "pack a bag" or "put your clothes away" stop being daunting, unmanagable tasks and start to be the title of a mental list of actions (does that make sense?) I also think taht PLAs such as changing batteries in toys, pouring activities (she’s still really shakey on this, hand eye co-ordination is still a challenge) and so on would probably help her a lot. It would also fill our day up a lot, leaving her with less "slumped infront of the TV time" which tends to be her defaut if not given direction. Of course, that also leaves me with less "gazing at the PC time" but I suspect that that would be a good thing really!
So, in a spirit of accountability, and starting once Duke is back at work so we have some sort of routine back again….
I hereby state the intent to instigate the first good habit in January which will be to get "school" done in the morning, right after breakfast and aim to do something practical in the afternoon.
hugs. You didn’t sound like a spoilt child, just knackered and frustrated, which seemed fair enough.
Hope you get through today ok, and get to come home early enough from D’s family that you actually get some rest this evening.
Comment by Alison — December 26, 2008 @ 1:16 pm
more hugs. hope today was good and your evening better, enjoy some you time. Practical life eh? I taught advanced practical life you know
I’m wondering about going on with monte qualifications actually, must have a chat with you about it all.
Comment by jax — December 26, 2008 @ 7:20 pm
I think mine would struggle with packing a bag too. Although I do think we have lots of dyslexia traits too so maybe that’s why!
And I’m with you on wanting to change my routines in the new year.
Comment by Kirsty — December 26, 2008 @ 7:22 pm
Jax, I’m actually thinking about going right back to the basics with Aprilia with PLA, you know, pouring, safely carrying things, cleaning up spills (I suspect she may enjoy deliberately spilling things in order to clean up….) and so on, THEN I’ll come shouting for you to tell me about the advanced stuff…. I only ever did 3-6 so I’m at your mercy for anything above that! And yes, I think you should go on with the qualifications if you can afford them, that way when we start our Monte school you will be properly qualified!!!!!
Comment by tbirdanni — December 27, 2008 @ 10:17 am
We will be continuing basic practical life with Small as well, though most advanced stuff is stuff you already do and have around as far as I can tell, sewing, knitting, cooking, woodwork, gardening… practical stuff y’know?
Will call OU tomorrow (got in way too late tonight) and see if can wangle my way onto maths course, and if not, may go Monte instead.
Comment by jax — December 29, 2008 @ 9:11 pm